


Nobody said it was easy.

by Racing_For_Life



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Changed tags halfway through, Charles Has Issues, Christmas Fluff, Cold, Coldplay References, Eating Disorders, Established Relationship, Everyone Is Gay, Everyone cares about each other, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Jos Verstappen's A+ Parenting is mentioned, Lando and Alex and George are boyfriend goals, Lando is cute, M/M, Max and charles become friends because plot, Max tries to work out what's going on, Most people have issues its not just Charles, Multi, My summaries are rubbish just read the book - thanks :), Nightmares and late night phone calls, No beta ignor the typos and spelling mistakes, No beta we die as free people, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pierre is a good Bro, Prevention methods, SLOW BURN GOES ON FOREVER, Sad, Self Confidence Issues, Worry, he always is, will i ever finish this?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:20:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28033800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Racing_For_Life/pseuds/Racing_For_Life
Summary: The world is changing. People leave, new people and old people join. But that is yet to come.Charles is rapidly loosing focus, Max sees this and he wants to help, but he can't if Charles wont tell him whats the matter. Charles doesn't see that the world still needs him.Alex receives news, and Lando and George try to help him through it. That mixed with all moving in together creates chaos, and fluff.Somehow all these things create some awful and amazing situations. There were lows, and there were highs, and they will race again.OrThe winter break is depressing, the slow burn between Max and Charles, and Lando, Alex and George are good boyfriends.Warning : slow ass updates.
Relationships: Alexander Albon/Lando Norris/George Russell, Charles Leclerc & Max Verstappen, Charles Leclerc & Sebastian Vettel, Charles Leclerc/Max Verstappen, Kevin Magnussen & Sebastian Vettel, Pierre Gasly & Charles Leclerc, Valtteri Bottas/Kimi Räikkönen/Sebastian Vettel (Mentioned)
Kudos: 49





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> None of this is true. Apart from positions and any crashes that happen. Off the track stuff is mainly made up by me, and obviously everyone is thier own person, so how on earth could I own them? If I owned F1, I would be older, richer, and I would have lots of things to say. 
> 
> Anyway, this is just something untill the race comes tommorow, then I can really get started. I hope this enjoyable, because its short and I hadn't really planned it. 
> 
> Have fun.

After crashing last time out in Bahrain, Charles and Max were hoping to get a good run on Sunday. Only Max was inside the top 10, with Charles's penalty from last time out coming in and knocking him into 12th.  
  
Max starting on pole would be nice, especially to finish the season. Charles was hoping for a better result, but it was race day that really counted. His seat was already confirmed, so he didn't have to worry, unlike his friend Alex, who still had to have his RB seat confirmed for 2021.  
  
George was back down the bottom of the field. At least picked up some points now.  
  


* * *

  
Sunday morning was a mess of drivers, press, mechanics and senior team going about the padock. After last race, Charles was determined not to crash out, but the race was always unpredictable. **Always.**  
  
Then of course there was the matter of Lewis in 3rd. He would do everything to get the win, but would it be enough?  
  
"Hey, Charles," Max nodded at the Ferrari driver, as he walked past. Charles looks up, and smiled slightly at the Dutchman, he would never admit it, but he did have a small crush on the man. But then, there were some things he kept private. Even from Lando, George and Alex.  
  
It wasn't that he and Max weren't friends, of course they'd often go out to the same pub with most of the grid after a race, and they spoke to each other at the track, but off track they didnt really connect. Max had his friends and Charles had his, and while there were only two main groups that would just hang out, containing a third of the gird each... then there were just a few others, they still had friends inside the group, and didn't ever go out in a group less than five that consised of the both of them.  
  
 _(I don't know if that made any sense sorry)_  
  
"Charles, common, team needs us," Sebastian calls from the doorway. Charles was just sat outside on the grass, not really doing anything.  
  
"Oh, sorry," He got up, not making eye contact with Seb, putting on his mask. Being outside and there being basically no one around the team building, he took the moment to breathe freely for a while.  
  
"Its ok, nothing's happened yet," Seb said, trying to make conversation with someone who it usually came naturally to. Seb had noticed recently that Charles wasn't acting himself. Seb had spoken in private with Kimi and Valtteri about it, and they all had noticed that the younger man had been a little quieter. A little more reserved.

He hadn't been to the pub with the grid for a few weeks, and he was spending more time in the hotel than with his friends. Seb had a rather fatherly instinct over him (although he tried to repress it, there were only 10 years between them) but he didn't like the thought that Charles wasn't ok. But more importantly, he wasn't finding help. 

* * *

After the meeting, Seb had had enough.  
  
"Are you ok, Charles?" He asked as the stopped outside the meeting room.

  
Charles looked up, "Hmm, yeah. Fine. Why?"

  
"Well, I don't know how to put this but you seem a bit... distracted. And it isn't just me. It's been going on for a few weeks, and I'm slightly worried."

"Well, I'm fine. So you can stop worrying. Anyway, why do you care? I can look after myself, I'm not a child," and then he walked away.  
  
Seb looked taken aback. He hadn't expected that from Charles. To by honest, he was more worried now than he was before.  
  


He walked out of the Ferrari building scratching his head, and almost walked into Kevin.  
"Oh sorry, didn't see you there,"

  
"Its fine. Are you ok?"

  
"Yeah, just a bit worried. Seen Kimi? Or Val?" Kevin looked confused. It wasn't like Seb to be worried, unless it was about the two Finns, although by the sounds of it, it wasn't them.

  
"Yeah, Alfa Romeo finished about 10 minutes ago. The Mercs are still in meeting," he replied,

  
"Thanks Kev,"

  
"Hey what's bothering you?"

  
"Just some team stuff. Well... Charles stuff,"

  
"Is he ok? I noticed he wasn't at the party last week,"

  
"I don't know. I'm trying to find out,"

  
"Ok, if you need any help with anything,"  
"I'll let you know," Seb said, as he ran off to find Kimi.  
  



	2. I set you apart.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Carlos and Lando, Seb and Charles. Lots of fluff.  
> Pre and Post race.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story gets deeper next chapter. This is just getting there. Lots of teamate fluff. Because why not.

_Come up to meet you,_

_Tell you I'm sorry,_  
_You don't know how lovely you are,_  
  
_I had to find you,_  
_Tell you I need you,_  
_Tell you I set you apart._  
  
It was emotional to say the least. The last race usually is but this just felt more so.  
  
When Charles and Seb swapped helmets, Charles read the message for him. **(I actually cried at that)**  
"Thank you," he said, fighting the emotion that was washing over him,  
"I'm going to miss you, buddy," Seb said,  
Suddenly Charles launched himself onto Seb, hugging him tight. Seb was a bit confused at the gesture at first, but then hugged the younger man back.  
  
"I'm sorry, for earlier. I- There's just some stuff going on and I was getting a bit stressed and just... argh," Charles mumbled into Seb's shoulder.  
  


"Its ok. You don't havs to be one hundred per cent the whole time. I was just worried about you," Seb said softly.  
  
They pulled back. 

"Whatever happens out there, let's just enjoy it,"  
  


* * *

  
  
After the race, the reality had really set into Lando's head.  
  
He was, by nature a happy guy, who could probably ramble on for years, but there was something in the air that night that made the mood very sombre.  
  
He and Carlos had speant basically every week (bar the breaks) with each other for two years. This was the end of an era, of course they were going to miss each other.  
  
After the last meeting, Lando was feeling a bit penned in, so he went outside and sat on the curb. Charles came out about five minutes later, and - saying nothing - joined his friend on the curb outside McLaren.  
  
The mutual understanding between the two drivers was there. They just needed a bit of human presence.  
  
A few minutes, Alex came and joined them. His future still in the balance, and he knew the feelings of the other two.  
  
So the three of them sat there for about half an hour. Just watching the comings and goings of everyone. The lights, and the simmering down. People going back to their hotels.  
  
Lando was thinking. About a lot. The feeling of reality was just coming to him, and the overwhelming feeling of loss, and Carlos hadn't even properly left yet.  
  
He didn't realise it, but a little salty river was making its way quietly down his face. Alex noticed this out of the corner of his eye, and scooted closer. Charles, too, saw this and moved closer, and put his arm around the younger man. Alex then copied his movements, and Lando's head fell forward, unable to contain the flow.  
  


"Sorry," he said softly, after he had subsided.  
"It's ok," Alex whispered, "We get it, "  
"Why don't we go and find them?" Charles said, equally as softly as the other two.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
"One last hurrah?" Daniel said, as He explained to his friends his plan to have a party at the hotel bar. Technically they were all bubbled anyway, and there wasn't anyone else in the hotel, it being race weekend and race staff being EVERYWHERE.  
  
"Sure, everyone?" Lando asked, knowing that it was very late, and some drivers may have already retired for the night.  
  
"Everyone we can get our hands on!" Dan said, "Oh sorry, that sounded wrong, haha. Everyone who wants too, I know Valtteri has gone to bed, um...Seb?"  
  
"Hello, yeah, he went to bed about ten minutes ago. Chances are he hasn't done anything yet, I'll go get him," Seb replied, as Esteban walked towards the small group of Seb, Dan, Lando, Charles and Alex.  
  
They all split off to get the rest of the grid, and met at the bar about ten minutes later. The only person not there was - understandably, since he was in a different country, - Romain Grosjean, but Kevin had a plan. He just hoped the Frenchman would pick up.  
  


* * *

  
  
"Lando, over here!" Carlos called as the Brit walked into the bar. He ran over to his teamate, and grabbed him, pulling him to the group of people.  
  
"Hey guys," Lando said, rubbing his arm where the Spaniard had pulled him.  
"Hi Lando," George said, putting down his drinke on the table, "You can sit here or forever hold your peace,"  
Lando sat, and Carlos pulled a chair from a table of four where Daniel, Max and Seb were talking.  
  
"Yeah, but if you change shorts then no-one will notice. Go, quickly," Alex got up and left.  
"What about changing shorts?" Lando asked,  
"Alex spilt his drink and we were working out how to sort it out,"  
"And that needed four of you?" Lando asked again.  
"Apparently... yes," George answered, laughing.  
  
They had been at the bar for about an hour, people were starting to go back to thier rooms.  
"I'm gonna miss you bro," Lando said, and he and Carlos walked back up the stairs to thier rooms.  
"Me too, me hermano," Carlos replied, ruffling the Brit's hair as they came to thier rooms.  
  
"See you in the morning for breakfast?" Lando asked, as they opened the doors "Diet's off for a bit, anyway,"  
  
"Sí, and Lando," Lando shot a look over his sholder to his teamate, "Te amo," Carlos smiled, and went into his room. Lando did the same, feeling better than earlier.  
  


* * *

  
"I'll see you over Christmas," Charles called as he exited the lobby. As he went up the stairs he ran a hand through his hair. This was going to be a shorter break, but he had a feeling it might last for a long time. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont know how to remive the second end notes if there are any. Next chapter up by next sunday


	3. You see the world in black and white

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex receives news, and its not good news. George and Lando refuse to lst him suffer alone. Nobody answers their phones, so Max has to call Charles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt so bad for Alex when the news came through. I would have got this through earlier, but some stuff happened, and then it was Christmas. And now I can't go to school. So... fun. I have a rough plan for next chapter, so keep going :) I promise it will get better.
> 
> Also I changed the tags. And the summery. But all you need to know is that Lando, Alex and George are dating.

A week. That's all it took for the world Alex had built to crash down upon him.  
  
Monday 14th December 2020  
  
The rumors had already set it. Sergio Perez going to Red Bull??? Alex was dissapointed, but it was... just rumours right? Then the second one, Alex going to AlphaTauri??? He hadn't been told anything yet.  
  
  
Wednesday 16th December 2020  
  
AlphaTauri sign Yuki Tsunoda.  
  
2pm GMT :  
  
 **Boys ♡♡♡**  
 **Georgyboi - Alex, you heard anything from RB yet? x**  
 **Alexiee - No.**  
 **Land-no - You ok dude???**  
  
Alex stared at his phone. What was he supposed to say? That he was so anxious that he was scared just to look at any social media or answer any official looking phone calls? That he had hardly slept all week because he was so nervous?  
  
So he just left it. Lando would probably pick up on it but he couldn't be asked to reply to the messages... there was too much on his plate.  
  
He loved his boyfriends, but he didn't know what to do now.  
  
  
Friday 18th December 2020  
  
Red Bull sign Sergio Perez for 2021, Alex Albon to be reserve.  
  
At half two ish, Alex's phone rang. It was Lando.  
  
"Hey, I just saw the news, you ok?"  
"It was inevitable. I didn't drive well enough last season,"  
"No! You drove amazingly." Alex sighed. He just couldn't bring himself to belive it, he messed up too many times, and that cost him his drive.  
"I... you're just saying that because you're my boyfriend. Look, I have to go. Bye,"  
  
Alex hung up, and flopped back on his bed. The amount of phone calls this past week had killed him, he had barely had any time to message his boyfriends, or parents, or even think about how the hell they were supposed to do Christmas. Tiers were a bummer, but at least it would be three households. No announcement from parliament untill tomorrow.  
  
Hopefully they can still move in together. They had planned to before, but racing and moving house doesn't really go very well.  
  
They had the keys to thier new place, and most of the stuff was packed. They just needed to move it. Maybe sooner rather than later. They thought maybe after Christmas, though it would be nice to spend it all together. They practiaclly lived together anyway, it was just a matter of making three houses one.  
  
At four o clock there was a knock at the door to Alex's flat. He got up from his bed where he had been lying for the past hour and a half and answered it.  
  
It was George and Lando.  
"Fuck the Government, we're not leaving you,"  
Alex smiled, and ushered them in, and they sat on the sofa, removing the masks that adorned thier faces.  
"You ok?" George asked slowly, already knowing the answer. Alex shook his head and sunk into the sofa. He looked more broken now than after any of the crashes he had had in the past. Lando hated anyone being sad... especially someone he cared about so much.  
"Hey, there's always 2022," Lando said, putting an arm around Alex. George on the other side. "I know it isnt really quite what I'd like to say,"  
  
>"I just.. argh!" Alex's hands flew it his head as we fell back into the small sofa they were all squashed on. "I tried so hard all season, and no-one recognises that. It isn't my fault that I cant keep up with Max, and everyone is just putting pressure on me and I... I just can't take it. I done one too many thing wrong and I can't go back and change that. I know there's something... deeper. I don't know... just one too many things,"  
  
"Have you eaten anything today?" George asked changing the subject, moving his thumb against Alex's hand. Alex shook his head  
"Too busy," he mumbled, and Lando took his other hand.  
"Too busy or you don't want to?" He asked softly.   
  
George got up without a word, and started clattering about in the kitchen. It was about the only thing he could make (pasta), but it was enough.  
  
Once the pasta was done, they all sat on the floor, Lando cross legged, back to the tv, and the other two leaning against the sofa. There wasn't enough room on the sofa to eat it comfortably. None of them realised their phones were ringing. Alex's was still on his bed, Lando had left his at home and George's was on silent.  
  


* * *

  
  
Max paced up and down in his apartment in Monaco, trying to work out why neither Alex, Lando nor George were answering thier phones. It was getting later and later.  
  
He hadn't heard from Alex all week, and with this news he wanted to check he was ok. Then he didn't answer the lots of calls. So he tried Lando, but he wasn't answering. George probably had his phone on him, so he called him. Still no reply.  
  
After he had made dinner, and done some other stuff, he was scrolling through his phone to find someone who might know something.  
  
Charles.  
  
He might know something, he was quite friendly with the other three. It was actaully quite late, (9pm) by the time he decided to call him. He would never admit it, but he did have a small crush on Charles, so he had to pluck up a lot of courage to call him.  
  
"Hello?" Charles answered the phone,"Oh finally! Someone who answers their damm phone!" Max celebrated,

"Um ok. Did you um need something?" Charles asked dubiously, looking out the window.  
"Oh yeah. Have you heard from Alex, Lando or George today?"  
"No, why? Has something happened?"  
"Do you not watch the news?" Or like talk to anyone... ever?"  
"Been... busy today. What happened?"  
"Red Bull signed Checo instead of Alex. He's reserve,"  
"Oh... oh my gosh, oh dear. I'll try and get hold of someone"  
"I kept trying earlier. No-one answered,"  
"Oh ok, shall I try now? Its about 8pm over there, and they were probably with each other, because they don't really care about rules when someone is upset, but they might be home now,"  
"Um ok? If not tommorow?"  
"Ok. I'll call or text you with answers."  
  


* * *

**Lando, Alex and George**  
  
"We need to work out when we're moving," George said, as he idly ran his hand through Alex's hair. Lando nodded as he flipped through the channels to find something on.  
"Maybe like the 5th of Januaury? I mean I have nearly all of my stuff packed,"  
"Yeah me too, I just got a few things that aren't packed, mainly clothes, but yeah. We can do that," George replied.  
  
"Thanks guys, for um... this, but I think I'm going to go to bed now," Alex mumbled, as he got up, Lando stopped channel-hopping for a moment, and it landed on the 24-hour news channel, thinking nothing of it.  
  
"Ok, well do you want us too stay, or shall we go?" Lando asked.  
"I don't mind, but you don't have any pyjamas, so maybe go home," Alex replied.  
"Ok, we'll call you tommorow, " George said, planting a kiss on the top of Alex's head, and Lando engulfed him in a hug. Alex smiled softly, he could always rely on Lando and George.  
  
After he saw them out, he went straight to bed, forgetting the tv that was on. He got ready to get into bed, it was just about 9pm, a bit early, but he couldn't be bothered. He knew his phone was probably blowing up with social media ect, but he couldn't face it.  
  


* * *

  
  
George got home and fished his phone out of his pocket, realising he had about ten missed calls from Max, and a few messages. He didn't know where Max was, or what time zone, so he would call him back in the morning. He made himself a cup of tea and went into his bedroom to watch some crappy telly.  
  
Lando arrived home after taking George back, and found his phone on the kitchen table. He must've left it there by mistake - oops. He checked it, to discover messages and missed calls from Max, and a few too many to just be a friendly call. He would have to remeber to call him in the morning.  
  
He texted George, to find out whether it was just him, or maybe Max was just feeling lonely.  
  
Lando had just finished making a cup of tea when his phone rang, it was Charles. Never one to miss an oppertunity to talk to one of his friends, he answered.  
  
"Bonjour Charles,"  
"Your accent is terrible,"  
"And hello to you too, I'm guessing you didn't just call to criticise my accent, so whaddya want?"  
"Max phoned me earlier, he wants to know how Alex is. I was confused, because I didn't know about umm... the whole Red Bull thing. So I said I would try and get hold of one of you, and that you or George would have probably pestered him untill he spoke to you. You are kind of close like that. " Lando grinned - they hadn't told anyone in the grid that they were dating, "So this is me calling you to find out how Alex is, and I did send him a text to ask him how he was, but he hasn't replied,"  
"Oh... ok. Um, well, he is still beating himself up, I can see it. We'll get him to give Max a call tomorrow,"  
"Thanks, I'll tell him. Any idea where Max is right now?"  
"Um, hang on I think he texted me,"  
Lando scrolled through his phone untill he found Max's contact, and clicked on the messaged, they were very simple.  
  
 **Max : Are you headed back to England?**  
 **Lando : Yeah,**  
 **Lando : Where r u going?**  
 **Max : Monaco**  
 **Lando : Not The Netherlands?**  
 **Max : No.**  
  
"He's in Monaco, aren't you in Monaco too?"  
"Yes!"  
"Mate, you sound way too excited to hear that someone else is in the same country as you,"  
"Yeah. Ok, well I'll let you go do whatever it is you do, night,"  
"Night Charles,"  
  



	4. I know something is broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there are about three million phone calls and lots of late night driving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An update? From me?! Wow!
> 
> Seriously, sorry that it has been so long, it was Christmas, then we found out we were moving, and we have been moving and sorting the old house out the whole of February. I didn't have Wi-Fi for 2 weeks, and then I had to catch up with school work. But thanks for sticking with me. 
> 
> WARNING : There will be descriptions of nightmares, car accidents and panic attacks in the chapter. I'll put a warning at the start and end of the passage.

  
  


Max woke up early the next day. He drifted about his flat, and his mind floated back to the conversation he had had with Charles. 

_ "Do you not watch the news? Or like, talk to anyone... ever?"  _

_ "Been... busy today. What happened?"  _

How did Charles not know anything about the Red Bull situation? He sounded ... almost lost, and had almost definitely made up some excuse to hide what he had actually been doing. Max cast his mind over the past few weeks, trying to find any titbits of information, anything that might give a clue as to what was wrong with Charles, or what had caused it. 

His thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of his phone, and when he picked it up he saw it was Alex. 

"Hello?" A weary voice came through the phone.

"Hi, Alex. I... uh, I wanted to find out how you were doing... I'm sorry," 

"I'm uh... I'm not gonna lie - it hurts. Damn it hurts... so bad, and ... yeah. I'm sorry I wasn't a better teammate, I hope you do better next season," 

"It's not your fault Alex. Red Bull are harsh, and they don't care about drivers, they just want to be the best. I'm sorry, if it were up to me, you would have a drive for the season. I really hope you get a drive in 2022, your time to shine is yet to come," 

"Thank you, Max. I'll see you next year I guess," 

"Yeah. Don't be a stranger," 

"Ok. Bye," 

"Bye," 

_Honestly_ , Max thought, _I think I feel worse now._ He sighed, and decided to go for a run. 

* * *

England, 5pm GMT 

The Government has announced new tier restrictions, to be in place from midnight. East places to be put under tier 4 restrictions. These places are : London, Kent, Buckinghamshire, Berkshire, Surrey excluding Waverley, Gosport, Havant, Portsmouth, Rother and Hastings, and East of England areas including Bedford, central Bedford, Milton Keynes, Luton, Peterborough, Hertfordshire, Essex excluding Colchester, Uttlesford and Tendring. 

Boys ♡♡♡

5:12 PM GMT 

Land-no : Um, guys, help

Georgyboi : What? Are you ok? 

Alexiee : Lando! Are you ok? 

Land-no : No

Land-no : panickinf a bit here help

Georgyboi : We are doing a call 

"Lando?" - G

"... yeah?" - L 

"Are you ok?" - G

"I think so, just had a bit of a panic moment," - L

"Alex?" - G

"Mm?" - A 

"Are you ok?" - G 

"Alex?!" - L

"I'm... ok," - A 

"You don't sound it," -L

"No... I'm fine, I was ... just worried. And there’s so much going on right now, I guess. Everyone else ok ?" - A

"I think so," - L 

"Ok, I'm fine too. George?" - A 

"Yeah, Lando what happened?" - G

"I was listening to the news," - L

"Never a good idea, but what did you hear?" - A 

"There's a new tier. Tier 4. And we're in it. You can't do the three household Christmas in it, and you can't visit anyone, ever! " - L 

"Shit, um ok. So, Lando, I'm going to watch the news at six, and I'm going to try and work out how we're going to do this" - G 

"Ok" - L

"Alex," - G

"Ok," - A

"I'll text you when I see something," - G 

"Ok. Bye," - L 

"Bye," - A

"Bye," - G 

They hung up, and George turned on his tv, then put his head in his hands. There had to be something. 

>Ye olde time skip<

Boys ♡♡♡

6: 30 PM GMT

Georgyboi : Ok I just watched the news. You can only celebrate with people in your household. At the moment we are 3 households. 

Land-no: so we need to all be in a household? 

Alexiee: yeah ... wait. We could move BEFORE Christmas. Then we would be one household...

Georgyboi: Alex you're a genius. When should we move? Can we still move? 

Alexiee: I just looked it up, we can still move, we just aren't allowed any help. 

Land-no: shall we move monday??? 

Georgyboi: yes! That gives us till thursday to unpack and put up decorations. 

Land-no : ooooooo I'm so excited. 

Alex grinned, momentarily forgetting all the stress of the week, and went to find a box. 

* * *

Monaco 

Max couldn't shake the feeling that Charles was hiding something. He knew they weren't best friends, but maybe ... if he asked. 

He had been trying to get rid of the voice in his head that was telling him to just call Charles. He'd been through a lot in his life - and Max knew what it was like to have everything crash down. He just hoped Charles was better at dealing with it than him. 

So at 8PM CEST he picked up his phone and clicked on Charles' contact. 

"Max?" His voice sounded low, almost void of any emotion, Max shut his eyes for a few seconds before answering,

"Hey." The answer was short, curt, or would have been - but the way Max said it, soft, almost as if he was the one who was on the receiving end, and as if he was the one about to be asked a rather personal question. 

"I spoke to Lando, he said he would get Alex to call you today. I'm sorry if he didn't, I can try again..." he trailed off not really knowing where this was going. 

"I'm... I'm actually not calling about that. I spoke to Alex earlier." 

"Oh... ok. What are you calling about then?" 

"I wanted to see whether you were ok..." 

"Yeah, I'm fine, why?" 

"Because I can see that you're not," 

"Well I am, so, goodnight Max," Charles snapped, about to hang up the call,

"Charles! No, wait," 

"What!?" 

"Look, I've been there... and I had to go through a year minimum, without anyone. So, please, if you need something, call me,"

"I-I-I don't know what you're talking about," Charles said, cursing his wavering voice, he was scared. 

"Yes, you do. Promise me you'll call," 

"I- you don’t know what’s going on! We’re not the same! Look I’m fine,” 

"Please Charles? Else I’ll have to call you every day" Max's voice was tugging him, 

"Ok, but really, I’m fine," he sighed, if it was going to keep Max off his back then he would have to agree to it,

"Thank you," 

Charles was shaking, as he hung up. He knew he had been a bit more reserved recently, but if people he wasn't really in massive contact with were noticing, he obviously wasn't doing the best job at hiding it. Although he wouldn’t speak to Max, they weren’t that close. 

Maybe he should actually talk to someone, rather than ignoring all the calls. The only reason he had picked up Max's calls was because he never really called him, and Charles was worried that something could be up. 

So when Pierre called him (as he did at the same time everyday) instead of letting it ring out as he had been doing for that week, he picked it up. 

They conversed in French. 

"Hello?" 

"Charles! Oh thank goodness! I have been calling all week, no reply! Why? Have you been ignoring me? Did I do something wrong?" 

"I'm sorry. I haven't been ignoring you (that was a lie). You haven't done anything wrong, it's ok. I... just have been really busy, and haven't had time to talk to anyone." Another lie. 

He had barely done anything all week. He had hardly slept, nightmares becoming more and more frequent. So after tossing and turning for the time that the sun had been away, he had gotten up and gone for a run. It's good to keep in shape. His early morning runs had been the only time his brain wasn't whirring with lots of different thoughts. If he could, he would run the whole day long. 

"I don't believe that for a second," Pierre replied 

"I'm fine!," Charles insisted but knew it was worthless. 

"Charles! I have known you for most of my life, you can't lie to me. I'm sorry, but I'm worried about you. Have you spoken to anyone else this week?" 

"Um, Max and Lando, why?" 

"Making sure you have actually spoken to people this week," 

"Ok… have you spoken to Alex this week?" 

"Yes, I messaged him telling him to phone me when he can, but he hasn't yet. Although I know Lando and George will look after him.  _ You _ , on the other hand, I am very worried about," 

"I'm fine!" 

"No, you're not! Please, just tell me what's going on! Please, Charles."

"Nothing's going on," 

“Look, I know you’re not ok, you know you’re not ok, so either you tell me what's going on, or I come down to your house and get you to tell me face to face,” 

“Pierre, I’m fine, you need to calm down,” 

"Alright, see you tomorrow," 

"What?" 

"I gave you a chance, I'll be down early morning," 

“No! Pierre!”

“Look, Charles, you’re just proving my point. You’re my best friend, I can’t bear to lose you too…”

“Sorry,”

“No, save it Charles, I’ll see you tomorrow,” and with that, Pierre hung up. 

He grabbed a bag and stuffed his toothbrush, some pyjamas and clean clothes, and his wallet and charger into it. Then he put his coat on, picked up his keys and started off in the general direction of Monaco. It was dark, but he wasn’t tired. He figured he would stop off at a B & B or something when he got too tired. Or stop off at a service station and sleep in the car. He was worried, and angry, at himself, at Charles, and at anyone who might have noticed something. 

At about 11pm he reached  _ Saint-Martin-Vésubie _ and stopped at the service station. He had to get more fuel, and he couldn’t help thinking he should call Max. Charles said he had spoken to him, so Pierre thought he should find out what he knew. 

“Pierre?” 

“Hello Max,”

“Can I help you?”

“Charles said he had spoken to you,” 

“Yes…” Max was unsure where this was going, 

“What did he say to you?” 

“What? Why?” 

“Because I’m really worried about him, and he won’t tell me what’s going on. I’ve tried everything,”

“Well that makes two of us, he hasn’t said anything to me either. I made him promise to call me if something happens, but he won’t, will he?”

“No… took me all week to get him to answer his phone and talk to me,” 

“Yeah, short of going over to his house and shaking him until he says something, I don’t know what to do,” 

“Well that’s what I am doing. I’m in Saint-Martin-Vésubie,”

“Shit really?” 

“Yeah, I…”

“Pierre?” 

“I’m really fucking worried about him Max. It's just, why won’t he talk to me? He’s my best friend, and… I don’t want to lose him, but it already feels like I am,”

“Yeah…” 

“Um, anyway, I should probably get going,” 

“You sure you shouldn’t be driving at the moment,” 

“I don’t think I would be able to sleep anyway,” 

“Oh, Ok, well, bye,” 

“Thanks, Bye,”

* * *

**WARNING - Nightmares, car accidents, and panic attacks.**

_ Going down the inside, into turn four. The car in front defended, he tried to brake. The brakes failed and then the world slowed down. Charles’ front wing smashed into the rear wing of the car in front. The two cars rolled over and over into the barrier. The sound was deafening, and then the pain was soaring through his body. The medics and marshals were telling him to stay still, but he was fighting them off, trying to get to the other car. In the panic he hadn’t registered which team or driver it was, and as some marshals pulled the driver from the wreckage, Charles ran and fell to his knees beside the other driver. There was blood everywhere and the marshals were getting the other driver’s helmet off. Then he spoke and Charles knew who it was.  _

_ “It was… you?” Pierre‘s voice fell through his head, his eyes widened. The marshals were pushing him away and some medics were trying to get him to stop moving and just come to the medical car.  _

Charles woke with a start.  _ It's ok,  _ he thought,  _ it’s just a dream, _ but his head didn’t acknowledge this. Soon enough he was having a full panic attack, and he knew he wasn’t going to be able to calm down without someone. He was already crying, and that mixed with the fact he couldn’t actually see made it clear that he wouldn’t be able to drive to anyone - who would he go to anyway? Through the dark blur he found his phone and shakily unlocked it. He went to his recents phone call and blindly pressed on what he thought was his best friend’s number. 

# 

About an hour after his conversation with Pierre, Max was asleep. Then his phone rang again. Thinking it was just someone in a call centre on the other side of the world, he cracked an eyelid open, only glancing at the caller ID. When he saw who it was, however, he bolted upright as he answered the call. As soon as he did, a shaky voice came through the phone,

“Pierre?” 

“Uh, no, it's Max…” Ah, so Charles had meant to call Pierre. What was he supposed to do? 

“Pierre is probably asleep or driving, Charles, is there something I can do?” 

Max was responded by shallow, sporadic breathing, and he realised that just picking up the phone was more than some would have done. 

“Help… please,” The voice from the phone was small, and wavering. 

“Um, it's ok Charles, I’m gonna be there in a few minutes, ok? Just keep talking to me,” 

“What?” Charles squeaked out 

“I’m coming to your apartment,” 

“No, no…. No,” 

“Its ok, its ok,” Max had already grabbed his keys, mask and coat, and was running down the stairs to his car,

“I’m going to hang up now Charles, is there a spare key I can use to get in?” 

“Under the mat,” he barely heard the whisper, but it was enough

“Thank you,” and he hung up. 

Charles was gripping onto the edge of the bed so tightly his knuckles were going white, still struggling to breathe. Everytime he blinked visions of the wreckage, and Pierre, came back into his mind. Suddenly he heard a noise that wasn’t in his head, a lock in a door. Max burst into his room, and sat down next to him. 

“Charles, breathe, ok,” he took Charles’ hands off the bed, and started rubbing little circles on them before he realised what he was doing, “Try and copy me, ok?” Charles nodded, and looked at Max while he tried to regulate his breathing. 

**END OF WARNING SCENE**

They sat like that for around twenty minutes while Charles calmed down. 

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” Max asked, but all Charles replied with was

“Pierre… I need to know he’s ok,” He tried to get up, but he was still shaking. 

“I spoke to Pierre, about an hour before you called me, he’s fine,” Max said softly.

“No, I need to speak to him,” Charles argued, 

“Look, I-” Max’s attention was caught by Charles’ phone which had sprung into life, Charles grabbed it, and Max sent a curious eyebrow, 

“It's Pierre,” Charles answered the eyebrow, then the phone. 

“Pierre êtes-vous ok?” Charles’ voice sounded frantic to Max and he wanted to find what caused it, 

“Oui, je vais bien, pourquoi,”Pierre’s voice grounded Charles, 

“Je te le dirai plus tard” Charles figured he would tell Pierre what had happened when he was actually in the same room, he didn’t want to go into it so soon, 

“Ok, eh bien, je suis à environ cinq minutes de ta maison,” 

“Ah bon?” 

“Oui, à bientôt, au revoir,” 

“Au revoir,” 

“What did he say?” Max asked, 

“He said he’ll be here in five minutes,” Charles replied, seeming slightly happier than just a few minutes ago. 

“Really?” Max was surprised, thinking he might have at least had a nap before setting off again, 

“Yeah,” He trailed off, and they sat in silence for a few minutes. 

“You don’t have to, y’know,” 

“What?” 

“Carry your world… and all your hurt. Pierre and I… we care about you,” 

“Yeah… I know, wait, no I don’t, I don’t know, I just feel, yeah…” 

“Look, I know something is broken, and I’m trying to fix it, I'm trying to repair it in any way I can, just give me somewhere to start. Ok?” Charles just nodded. 

There was a knock on the door, and Max got up, “I’ll get that, we all need to have a discussion,” He opened the bedroom door, 

“Max?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Thank you,” 

“You’re welcome,” Max smiled. It might take a while, but he had a feeling that Charles would be ok. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are feeling that I haven't updated recently (the past couple of weeks) just pop in a comment and I promise I will read it. I just need motivation sometimes, and other times I might have just completely forgotten. Any theories you have, I would love to know about!
> 
> Also, I have no idea where Pierre lives or how long it might take, but I know its about a hour and a half from Saint-Martin-Vesubies to Monaco. Most of the French bit was from google translate, I have only just started learning it. 
> 
> Also also, did anyone notice the Coldplay references????

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first book on F1 too. Thanks for reading, I hope to update once a week ish. Although I am known for not keeping to deadlines ect. Please comment and tell me what I am doing well, what I could do better, and any mini plots that might be doable. 
> 
> Thanks for reading xx


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